Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Chelle Seeking


After things fall apart and you are left picking up the pieces it is hard to determine which pieces are yours and which are someone else's.  (Taking this personality test reminded me who I am.)  Some of the pieces are infused together and those are building blocks of experience that you take with you.  Kiss them gently, attach love to them, cleanse with tears and place gently in your growing garden of knowledge.
The weeds clutter your garden so you have to be a constant gardener.  Uproot the sadness, the loneliness, the frustration, the pain.  When weeds overwhelm and you need help to get your garden back in shape, don't be afraid to ask for help. You are loved!


Let the tears be the fountains in your garden. Allow memories to be the statues. Chizel the goodness. Cultivate the beauty of why you fell in love in the first place.



I mix my salty tears with ocean waves.





I unlock doors that I didn't know exist.





Hugs and laughter mend the brokeness.  I give myself permission to feel all of the feelings I need to feel to allow myself to heal.  I feel the intense sadness.  I embrace the fear of the unknown future. 

I am determined to free myself from the destructive patterns of my past. 


I mourn the loss of my fairytale romance.
 

I accept myself and all the aspects of what makes me who I am.

Our personalities are ingrained into every fiber of our beings.  When I understand I feel TRUE comfort.  I do not have to rely on false comforts any longer.  The void is instead filled with compassion and love. 

I can feel love grow inside of me and it is exciting. 

One day at a time.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Fairytale Ending

I wrote this four years ago and sadly it fits today. 
My spirit is in need of cleansing.  Though I am harmed I am not broken.  I am stronger and wiser.
I won't give up on love, I will just be cautious about whom I share my love with. . .  someone who is ready to be open and honest, and willing to risk being hurt.
Negative thoughts fester over time, and become ugly like a stagnant pond, all that was living dies.  Committing to someone shouldn't feel like a life sentence, and if it does then get out! 
If you plant a seed and store it in a dark cold room, you can't expect it to thrive.  I hoped there was a shaft of light that would break through, and reach the seed.  It was weak and withered relying on a single shaft of light to save the day.  I will not settle for a shaft of light ever again. 
For a seed to thrive into something sturdy and strong, it needs nurtured, and lots of sunlight, warmth and love.  I have many years worth of manure to fertilize, and now I need lots of sunshine!

Fairytale Ending
there once was a girl who met a boy

and she had been under an evil spell

she was a woman scorned

bruised from the past

the boy offered her his coat but not his heart

but she had mistaken his kindness for love

she started to fall

for the ideals that love entails

and her tunnel vision blinded her

the boy kissed her sweetly

and the spell melted away

she didn't mind the mirror

and saw herself in a different way

the boy held her close, he held her tight

and she tried to make the puzzle pieces fit with all of her might

no future to offer, no promises made

her thoughts ran wild and to her

fantasy world she became a slave

she unlocked the truth and settled the score

she's not a caged bird that will come back for more

good bye sweet prince of darkness

good luck with your reign

the girl closed the door, and left with her pain.