Sunday, August 8, 2010

I release. . .

disappointment
the hurt inside my heart
fear
brokenness
the feeling of being taken advantage of
unforgiveness
empty promises
my ignorance
the inability to see things right in front of my face
horrible feeling of confusion
darkness
panic
nervousness
hateful ugliness
negativity
the feeling of betrayal

When does this pain go away?  It burns through my core.  

God, why do I have to be such a sensitive soul?  I can hardly bear it sometimes.  How else can I learn but by experiencing all of it?
When there is joy in my heart there is no longer room to rewind and replay the images of the past.  Releasing this negativity frees up space for new experiences and opportunities to love. 

I release a gut-forced blow-out of a cry pouring from my eyes onto my typing fingers. 
I release the worry about having solutions to every problem.
I pray instead.

  

2 comments:

Stacey said...

Focus on the wonderful opportunities you have been given and the fact you are experiencing new culture, people, lands, smells. Celebrate your senses and dive into the now. It's where you were meant to be and where you will find the deep well of yourself. We aren't mind readers or psychics (altho I may be 10% - hee), we cannot know another's path or intentions. It is not for us to know anyhoo-- does that make us fools! No. Another rung on the ladder that many of us have climbed alongside you. Embrace the love soul sista.

Your blog looks fantastic!!!!!!! I can't wait to receive my advent head and drink tea...get home Beatrice! Then back there so I may visit.

My Word verification is mushysfu- hee.

Michelle said...

I love you! <3