Monday, September 26, 2011

six months

 This picture above was taken at Volunteer Park Cafe in North Capitol Hill.  The tea I was drinking was called Harmony.  It was wonderful. 
So I found a moment to sit at a cafe and write.  It is a Sunday afternoon and I am sipping a mug of mint tea in Wallingford.  I am at Irwin's Bakery and Coffee Shop on the corner of N 40th St and Bagley Ave. N. The street is busier than I was hoping for as far as being peaceful but that is when you have to find the peace within and drown out the noise around you.
I just spent the last few hours walking around the arboretum with one of my friends.  I didn't feel like probing him with questions today.  I just wanted peace for myself and spent some time reflecting.  We spent a lot of our time together in silence.  It is a beautiful beginning of fall and I am in love with this place and this season.
I am blessed to have a steady income.  I am blessed with a job.  
I appreciate the opportunity to take all of this in, the beauty I witnessed yesterday was one of the most amazing sites I've ever seen in my life.
 The smell of the flowers, the perfection of nature, the scenery that looks like a postcard.  Mount Rainier is magnificent, and this place is called Paradise.  It reminded me of the movie What Dreams May Come.  It felt like being in a fantasy location.  The pictures do not do this place justice.  
I am where I am meant to be.  God is revealing his blessings to me, the gifts of friendships, the gifts of nature, the gifts of life and awareness.  I am so grateful for everything.  Thank you God so much for blessing me.  I am so overwhelmed with gratitude. 
There is a time and a season for everything and this is a season of reflection and a time for gratitude.  I smell chocolate chip cookies baking as I watch leaves whirl in little wind storms around my feet.  I am listening to Hildegard Von Bingen and enjoying the afternoon sun on the back of my neck.
Six months I have been in Seattle and I have settled into a new life.  I have made friends. My familiar is pleasing to me, the sights I behold while in the daily grind.  I smell the scent of roasting coffee beans every morning as a drive through Fremont.  I see the Space Needle everyday, and Lake Washington.  On a clear day I can see Mount Rainier, and on a hazy one, I know it is there.
I am so happy for this moment. I feel at peace right now.


Monday, September 19, 2011

nostalgia



This is one of the songs that reminds me of my first love.   I wanted to move to Seattle over a decade ago, and because that love relationship fell apart, I stopped trying to live that dream.  Now I am here.  I didn't expect it.  Had I made that move years ago there is so much that has happened since then that has shaped me into the person that I am that I would have missed.  There are wonderful people that I wouldn't have met.  Lips I wouldn't have kissed.  The timing is God's timing, and when I try to rush into things, it doesn't work out.  The worry and the anxiety, doesn't need to be. 
I was digging through all my boxes searching for the title to my vehicle the past couple of days and I kept finding things that reminded me of the struggles and pain I went through this past year.  It unearthed the feelings that I have been avoiding or maybe I have pushed below the surface.  Reminders of mistakes I have made.
My mom has been such an encouraging person in my life.  I have found so many cards, letters and little notes that she has given me over the years.  I laughed and cried and dug through the next box and found more. 
When I realize that I have moved so far away from my family and friends, it is bittersweet.  I am doing what I wanted, and they encouraged me, but I feel like there are things that I am missing there.  I can't just hang out with my mom any time I want.  I can't drive over to my best friend's house to help her paint her kitchen.  Our lives go on and they are voices on the phone, and they live their lives and I live mine.  Parallel, but not directly intertwined.
I don't know what the future will be for me.  Something led me to this place.  After all the searching, the title was in the first box that I had opened, right where I thought it was all along.  Now all the boxes are everywhere and and I will have to put everything back in place.  I guess it was time for the reminders.


Thursday, September 8, 2011

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

promises to myself

1. watch more sunsets
2. breathe deeply
3. listen to my intuition
4. go for hikes
5. take chances
6. be a light