Friday, June 7, 2013

stirring the pot

If you've never tried craniosacral therapy, you should give it a whirl.  I was told that I had one of the worse cases of TMJ (temporomandibular joint or tightness in my jaw) by two different therapists that either of them have ever seen.  After three visits with my naturopath doctor; Dr. Theresa Goldsmith at The Emerald Center for Integrative Medicine,  performing craniosacral massage, the tightness is almost gone.  My doctor said it was not only from the work she's done but the truth I have proclaimed in my life recently.  I carry stress in my jaw from holding my tongue from the truth.
What truth?  
I am bored with my job.
I lack direction in my "career" path.  
I need to find work where I can thrive.  

How many more desk jobs will I have where I burn out in two years and have to move to another position?  I am having trouble moving around in the current company.  Doors are closed to me.  I am flailing like a fish out of water.  I'm a round peg trying to fit into a square hole.  My truth keeps the doors closed.  
Time to find the open doors.
I am beginning to explore the options of moving on in my search for fulfilling work, or at least working toward a goal to make a truth-filled future for myself.  I had a poor review with my current position in customer service.  I have been taking things personally when people speak to me with anger or frustration.  I get defensive.  I am experiencing burn-out.  I don't like the way I feel about my job.  I am trying to approach it with a better attitude.  I am grateful to have a job.  I don't need to give my power away because of some jerk's bad day.  I am better than that.  It is not fulfilling my soul, but in the meantime I must not let it steal my joy. 

I am looking into possibly trying massage therapy, or photography or nutrition, or ???  I would have to beef up on the organic chemistry classes if I wish to follow the path of nutritionist, and that may take me at least four years to get there.  Is that what I really want?  The help is there if I need it, the universe will open up and accept whichever path I choose.  I have dates set up to explore the programs and I am looking forward to seeing what is out there.

I won't listen to anyone trying to tell me what I CAN'T do.  There have been too many times where I let negativity keep me from moving forward or pursing one of my passions.  I can do whatever I put my mind to do.
With focus and ambition and federal student loans, I can go back to school and learn something that I can do that will be more in alignment with who I am.
I am glad that I am able to get away on the weekends to the woods and see beautiful things.  This is the absolute best therapy.   But all the stirring is bringing about another change in the season. . .new choices to make.  Stirring the pot that's been stagnant for a long time feels good.  It is time to take the next step. . .

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